Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Wide Awake When I Want to be Dreaming

I'm having one of those nights where no matter what I do I can't sleep.  But I REALLY want to.  It's been a stressful day--and I'm not even sure why.  It is just one of those days where my emotions are right on the edge for no real reason at all; but because they are I've been letting little things (and some bigger ones) get to me all day long.

Unfortunately when things "get to me" I tend dwell on them for a long time and, as a result, I find myself lying awake at 1:00am, still processing everything that bothered me today.  This processing includes everything from trying to interpret what so-and-so meant when they said something, to imagining conversations that will probably never happen, to creating to-do lists in my head for the next day.  Mixed in with all that there is also a lot of trying to convince my brain to STOP doing all those things.  *sigh* 


Life is confusing right now, and I'm a worrier to begin with, so this has been happening to me a lot lately.  I'm burned out.  I'm discouraged.  I need a break and I need a change but at the moment I can't seem to get either one.

But most of all I really need some sleep.    



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